Steven's Diary
by animelover4ev
Summary: After tragic and crazy events, Steven decides to write in a diary he once had forgotten about... of which all of his most deepest concerns and problems reside, and of which the gems have no knowledge of. (Warning: May be dark at times. Each chapter will be an entry in Steven's diary with an ongoing story.)
1. Chapter 1

_Dear Diary,_

 _I'm really sorry that I haven't written to you in a long time. Things have just been really stressful with the Gems lately. Pearl has been having panic attacks lately because of the fact that my birthday is coming up.. which is also when Mom died.. You know, no one really likes to talk about Mom's death. I guess they just don't want to make me sad or whatever. But why would I be sad..? I mean yeah, I'm pretty bummed out that I didn't get to meet her.. But Dad tells me ALL the stories about them and their little love life, and that's pretty cool right? The Gems really miss her a lot and so does Dad.. Man, one day I wish I could be as awesome as my mom! I wish she could be here today.. then no one would be sad.. Diary, why did I have to be born? My mom was so awesome and me? I'm NOTHING compared to her! I haven't fully mastered my skills yet and who knows if I ever will! I hate myself... Why can't I just disa-_

"Steven, are you alright?" Garnet questioned as she walked into the room.

"Oh.. u-uh.." Steven stuttered as he quickly slid his diary under a pillow, forcing a smile on his face, "y-yeah I'm fine."

"Then why are you crying?"

"Oh, well.. I was just thinking about how lucky I am to have such great friends like you, Pearl, and Amethyst! It just makes me so happy that I let out happy tears! I love you guys," he said, wiping the tears from his rosy cheeks.

"Hmm.. Well we love you too Steven." Garnet smiled, but still looked a bit concerned, "Anyway, the Gems and I were going to just go for a walk around the town and Amethyst wanted to know if you'd like to come with us."

" Uhm.. Sure! Just wait outside for me and I'll be there in a little bit."

" Alright." Garnet said and left the room. Steven sighed and took a deep breath.

 _Sorry Diary, Garnet walked in.. Phew! That was a close one.. Well I'll get back to you later, the Gems asked me if I wanted to go on a walk with them and they're waiting for me. So, I better get going!_

 _Love,_

 _Steven Universe_


	2. Chapter 2

"Hey guys, sorry it took so long.. Sooo where are we going?" Steven ran outside with his hamburger backpack.

"Well, we're not entirely sure where yet. We just decided that we'd go for a nice walk on a fine day like this.. I just need a day to escape the house for a while. To just get away from things," Pearl smiled.

"Right. Steven, would you like to lead us?" Garnet asked the youngster.

"Well maybe-"

"Aha! No! Let ME lead the way!" Amethyst interrupted Steven.

"Y-yeah, let Amethyst lead the way! I don't really care where we go." Steven giggled.

"Alright.. " Pearl nervously replied, "Amethyst I guess you're leading us. Where to first?"

"Just follow me and you'll see! You'll all see! Bwahahaha! " Amethyst laughed.

"Is it okay if I bring Lion along too? He's been a little down lately and I think he'd like to take a walk too."

"Anything you want Steven. We better get going," Garnet stated as she fixed her glasses, "and maybe we could get something to eat on the way."

Steven nodded and called for Lion to come. He hopped up on his back and they started to follow Amethyst. Pearl was quietly humming as she looked up at the clouds. She gracefully walked behind Garnet who just walked with a neutral look on her face. Steven just sat on Lion thinking to himself.. He wanted to know where they were going and why. He wanted to know why everyone was so quiet. He was worried that they were going to tell him bad news.. Steven buried his face in Lion's mane and just rested. Little did he know he'd ended up falling asleep there.

"Hey, Steven. Wake up. You need to see this." Garnet shook Steven. Steven yawned as he looked up in awe.

"This.. This is amazing!" Steven was speechless. "How long was I asleep? Where are we?! Where are the other Gems?"

"Calm down Steven. They're just out getting some food. We noticed you were asleep but didn't want to wake you because you stayed up late last night. You slept for a few hours. I honestly don't know how though; sleeping on an animal's back sounds very uncomfortable."

"WHAAAT?! A FEW HOURS? What did I miss? WHERE are we?!" Steven exclaimed as he jumped off Lion and fixed his backpack.

"I told you to calm down Steven! I don't know exactly where we are, just someplace outside of town. Don't worry you didn't miss anything important. Just sit down and relax."

"Steven! You're awake! I brought some food. It might not be much but we acquired what we could. Garnet, could you start the bonfire please? Amethyst, could you try to find some supplies that we could use to make a shelter? While you were asleep, Steven, we decided since it's getting dark anyway, that we'd just camp out somewhere, and this is the perfect place to do it!" Pearl said excitedly. She really liked the idea of spending a night under the beautiful stars and just relaxing on the grass with the cool night breeze.

Steven took a moment to take it all in and just decided it was probably best for everyone to relax out of the house. He nodded and went and sat in the grass, holding his backpack in his arms. He stared at the sky. It was beginning to darken. The clouds were beginning to fade. The sun was almost gone, and the moon was rising. Lion walked up to Steven and lied next to him, yawning. Steven leaned on Lion and watched as Pearl prepared the food.

"I'm not hungry. I ate earlier." Steven told Pearl.

"Well that's okay, it just means more for me!" Amethyst joked.

"Amethyst! …Anyway, are you sure Steven? I have more than enough."

"Yeah, I'm sure. I'll be alright. Thanks anyway!" Pearl nodded and Garnet sighed. She definitely knew something was up, but couldn't quite figure it out yet.

It soon grew very dark. The only light the Gems and Steven had was from the bonfire and the moonlight. Though Pearl had cooked enough for a family of five or more, only Amethyst and Lion were the ones who ate it, but no one really complained. They were all satisfied. Amethyst was already fast asleep and snoring away. Pearl and Garnet were dozing on and off. Steven was still wide awake, staring into the fire. He sat up and pulled out his diary from his backpack.

 _Dear Diary,_

 _Well the walk with the Gems and I was good I guess. I really wouldn't know actually.. Garnet said I fell asleep for a few hours but didn't want to wake me because she thought I was pretty tired. I guess I was.. Anyway, Pearl seems to be pretty happy about getting out of the house for a night. Right now, everyone, including Lion, is sleeping. I'm really glad that I found Lion.. He's the closest thing (besides my gem) that I have to remind me of Mom. It just makes me feel really bad that Mom's gone because of me.. But the Gems seem to love me and so does Lion.. so am I really that bad of a person , Diary? I don't know anymore.. I feel so alone, like no one understands me. I'm happy that you're here for me Diary. I really need someone.. or SOMETHING to talk to about these things.. I mean I would talk to Connie but she got grounded last week for sneaking out to come see me.. I'll call her first thing in the morning. Maybe she can help me feel better.. Oh, and one last thing.. Diary, I'm sorry for dragging you into my problems.. But I promise I'll make up for it one day. I think I'll go to sleep.. Later Diary!_

 _Love,_

 _Steven Universe_


End file.
